Raising Bryant (a tribute to moms)

As I have become a grandfather my thinking is changing. And, to be honest, I’m not sure how to describe it. I seem to simultaneously be looking back while looking forward. I think a lot about my childhood. Not school, but home life. My family, my house… just what life was like when I was a child and what really made it great. Because it was. While thinking about my childhood, I think about Bryant’s also. And pretty soon it will be Bryant and Easton’s that I’m thinking about. 

I think mom’s are key to a childhood being described as “great”. Whether it was the mom that birthed you or the one that raised you or the aunt or sister that loved you, if your childhood was great, there was most likely a “great” woman in your life. Let me tell you about a few in mine.

Mom taught me about grace. How to love everyone. 

Tammy (my wife and mother to my awesome son and awesome daughter) taught me about being selfless. How to give and give until you’ve given all and then somehow giving more. 

Wanda (my wife’s mother) taught me about being accepted into a family that’s not yours. 

Mom taught me about righteousness. It was normal for her to get up after dinner while everyone was in the living room watching Dukes of Hazard and pick up her bible and go to her room. She would read and then you could hear her praying. 

Tammy taught me how to love. If you’re going to do it, you go all in. She doesn’t hold anything back. If you’re on her team, you’re on her team. 

Wanda taught me about hard work. Listening to stories about her days at Levi’s and how hard the work was is encouraging in day when laziness seems to be rampant. 

Mom taught me about forgiveness. This is the way she lives her life. Even people that I struggled to forgive because of the way they treated her; she forgave. She always forgives. 

Tammy taught me about strength and dignity. She is the strongest woman I know. When she focuses her strength in a certain direction, she will accomplish what she sets out to do. She won’t give up.

Wanda taught me about family. She always includes family. It’s priority one for her. 

These are the mothers in my life. The women who have affected me the most throughout my 47 years on this earth. And this also brings me to Kelcey. The one raising Bryant. She has learned from these three also. And the amazing thing about life, family, and a heritage, is that it goes on. If I were to describe Kelcey to you, I couldn’t do it without describing her mom and grandmothers. She is righteous, she has strength, perseverance, a strong sense of family, and she loves hard. 

You see, our life isn’t about this life. It’s always about the previous and the next one. My mom and dad’s life is and was never about them. It was about those closest to them… their parents, grandparents, children, grandchildren and now, great grandchildren. My life and Tammy’s life isn’t about our life; it’s about those that we now live for. Until you care for a child (your own children, or maybe nieces, nephews, younger siblings, etc.) I’m not sure you can comprehend such a statement. I can assure you that Kelcey didn’t understand what it meant to live for someone else until she started raising Bryant. 

Oh, and guess what? She also didn’t understand God’s love until that moment she heard Bryant’s little heartbeat. For all the glorification of the day we celebrate mom’s, you can boil it down to the fact that if you have or had a great mother, you’ve experienced a small dose of the power of God’s love. Unconditional, relentless, unexplainable love. 

So for Mother’s Day, be sure and tell those moms in your life how special they are. But don’t forget that the love they give was given to them by a Holy God that loved them and taught them how to love. That special bond a mother has for their child isn’t physical. It’s spiritual. It’s born of the relationship that God desires from us through Christ. 

Mom, you are the first woman that I truly loved and it continues with every breath. Thank you for being my mom. 

Wanda, thank you for calling me son, even though we don’t share any DNA. 

Tammy, no words will be enough for me to describe who you are or what you mean to me. Thank you for being the loving nurturing side of our parental unit. I love you.

Kelcey, remember that you and Ryan are never alone on the journey. His parents and your mother and I may not have the stamina we once did, but we will always have room, energy, and time to help you guys raise Bryant (and Easton). We will always have that because none of us are living for ourselves. Family, legacy, heritage doesn’t work like that. 

Happy Mother’s Day moms!

Pastor Dad