Pyromania

            Tammy almost burned down our house yesterday. Might as well get straight to the point huh? She was supposed to stay in Nashville Saturday night and pick up Kelcey from the airport on Sunday and bring her home. Well, she got sick and ended up driving home on Saturday evening. So Sunday after finishing our worship service I got in the car and drove to Nashville.

            Before the story let me say that my wife is one of the funniest people that I know. And she is by far the most funnest person I know. When she gets tickled and can’t stop laughing she actually cries! Its great! That is a picture to think about as I share Sunday’s adventure!

            Because Tammy is sick and I am going to Nashville this left her at home with waaaaay too much time on her hands. Jordan had agreed to smoke a turkey for dinner and Tammy was busy cleaning (which is all she does when she’s sick). Jordan decides to go play basketball while the turkey is smoking and tells his mom to add wood chips every hour (I think the time is right but it’s something like that but the key word is “add”).

            Fast forward to around 5:15pm when Kelcey and I get home. Tammy is just working away getting dinner ready while simultaneously packing lunches for Monday. She asks me to light the grill so I can grill our veggies for dinner and as I open the door, our house fills with smoke! I notice on the back porch (made of wood) is a cardboard box on fire. While trying to figure out the best way to handle this I calmly (it really was calm) ask Tammy why there is a box on fire on the porch. She comes running from the kitchen bringing the broom that I asked for saying, “oh no, I put like 3 or 4 cups (CUPS) of water on it”.

            I knock it off the porch and go inside to get more than 3 or 4 cups of water to put out the flames and I asked her what happened and this is what my awesome wife said:

            “Jordan went to play ball and told me to replace the wood chips every hour. So when I opened the smoker and took out the chips I didn’t know what to do with them so I threw them in the box. They were black and not red so I thought it would be ok but I poured 3 or 4 cups of water on them to be sure.”

            Jordan and I both stopped in our tracks as Jordan said, “Mom, I told you to add, not replace. Did you open the smoker and take them out?”

            “That was the only way! It was hot and smoky but I had to do it!” she replied very confidently!

            The investigation after the incident showed that there is a place on the porch that was black and scorched! But Pyro stands by her claim that she poured 3 or 4 cups of water on it.

            Needless to say, dinner was a laugh all the way through since we ate on our back porch and were able to reference the before mentioned scorched wood that was in close proximity to where we were dining! In all honesty it was a perfect dinner to kick us into the evening from a very hectic week and weekend.  As we sat outside at the table laughing about many things I just thought to myself…”Family is so very important. My relationship with Christ is first and paramount in my life but on the heels of that is family. I don’t know many parents who get the opportunity to sit with their adult children without phones or any other distractions and have a meal and talk and laugh. We are so blessed.” Tammy and I finished cleaning up and packing lunches while Kelcey and Jordan went and got a movie.

            On a different note, I saw where the ladies of our church were having a bonfire this weekend and I’m thinking this is right in Tammy’s wheelhouse! And if you see our resident arsonist today please say hello and give her a cup of water. She may need it at work if the Courthouse catches fire!

 

            Have an awesome week!

            Pastor Dad