Maryville's Hugest Building Idea Yet

I have a great idea. Not just an ordinary lets mix it up and get unsweet tea today idea but a colossal idea. This is huge and I am going to be so wealthy that the U.S. Government is going to have to ask me for money (wait, that already happens so maybe I need to… never mind)!

Hear me out before you shoot me down. I love the fact that Maryville has a new movie theatre. I mean really excited that I don’t have to go to Turkey Creek for a great movie experience. Buuuuuuut the question remains what to do with the old theatre. Here is where I am brilliant.

Let’s buy it and turn it into a building for churches. There it is. The proverbial cat is out of the bag. Yes, this can work. There are already office buildings in Knoxville and other cities that advertise that you can have your own office space and they will staff it for you. We do that for churches. And let’s face it, we have a lot of churches in Blount County and many more starting each month (I know, my church is part of this, don’t hate).

Here you go. Advertise that a church can start up in our building and have their own sanctuary (theatre) that has nice stadium seating, we provide the lobby experience complete with coffee, refreshments, and we could even sell TestaMints to keep the Jesus thang rollin. Imagine a new church wouldn’t have to look all over for a school or abandoned building to start up in. And, and, and, we could use the movie poster holders outside on the side of the building for each church to put their own poster in. The ticket booth will be where they get their bulletin for their respective church. Plenty of bathroom space. And the marquee above the bulletin booth will scroll church names and “worship times” instead of show times. Oh my gosh, we can even collect the tithe at the booth. This growing right before our very eyes.

As much as some people change churches it will save them gas and headaches about taking a different route or choosing a new parking space. And with many churches building their church on the backs of other churches members it makes for easy pickin (before you get offended, every church is guilty at some level). Annnd the way some Pastor’s move around they may only have to go down the hall to their new flock. Heck, we may even hire a staff pastor to fill in for vacations and sickness and stuff. I may even take up the first theatre and move my church there. Location, location, location people!

I am soooooo excited. Now all I need is a million or so dollars and we can get started. Any investors out their read my blog (I know, probably not, but you can’t blame a guy for trying).

Or we could just have Carmike turn it into a dollar theatre and then the Christians and atheists would have something to celebrate together.

Pastor Dad
            PS… I hope you laughed

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